Teaching is a noble profession.
During my first school year as teacher, I was an adviser for thirty three (33) lovable students. Thirty three diamonds with different brightness, twelve (12) males and twenty-one (21) females. I handled five sections every semesters, I handled hundreds of students in total.
When you are a teacher in the Philippines, your job description is not just to teach. You have to deal with bunch of paper works. There are times that you will choose if you will attend your class or will finish your other task. But honestly, most of the time we have to choose the papers rather than our students…and that shocked me so much on my first year.
I posted once on my Facebook, “I love teaching when it only requires me to teach,” and that was very true and personal to me. That post was misunderstood by others. But should I explain to them why I posted it? I know I don’t because that’s what my heart says while my mind was accepting the reality.
There were times that I was hurt of situations. For example, when my Principal texted me this, “…I think this is the 2nd project assigned to Mrs. Carganilla which again without positive result. Nagkataon naman…?” I felt that she was implying that I am incompetent to chair activities in school. My ego was hurt. I replied her long message that I hope I did not. Clearing all the mess, she told me that the text message was a challenged on my part. And I feel sorry that I interpreted her message that way. I hope the mirror was not broken so we can really fix things.
But that was just a portion of a whole. What hurt me most was when my students choose a wrong path. I felt so bad when three of my students got pregnant. My 16 years old male student confessed that his girlfriend was pregnant; I was the first adult to know the fact. Of course, as an adviser, I told them to say it with their parents. But I understand that they were not able to say it for months. And when finally they did, one of my 17 years old female student suddenly stop going to school. The reason? The same thing. She was pregnant by his boyfriend. And it doesn’t stop in that news, because another female student chooses to live in the house of her boyfriend, who is another, a male student of mine because she just hated her own mother and to live in their own house. And when the month of May came, another student confessed that she was 6 months pregnant, asking help because she wanted to enroll on the next semester given her situation. The news hurt me so much. It seems I am not doing enough.
Life of a teacher is very challenging. It sucks sometimes. Teaching itself, I mean sharing of knowledge is easy but dealing with the issues will test your sanity.
But what makes me happy in the whole year? The surprises of my students during teacher’s day, birthday day and Valentine’s Day. There were times that I am asking myself? Did I do something good to deserve their love? Oh well…that I don’t know.
Another was my student’s achievements. I was so happy to see most of them doing their best to reach their goals. I was happy with their friendship, with the love that binded them as classmates. I love to see them supporting each other, and enjoying their senior high school years. As if they really came from my womb.
Favorites? That I don’t have. But honestly I trusted some of them better than other, but I am not considering them as my favorites. It maybe sound not so real, but I love them all. I accepted them all knowing their strengths and weaknesses. They are lovable children, and they are my children.
I am not closing my doors to other opportunities outside this profession but I know that with the ups and down of my first school year, I believe I can stay longer. So, as long as there are students who will listen and need me, I will be a teacher.
I am a newbie teacher, shocked of the kind of work I accepted but I’m starting to love this profession with all my heart and soul.
<Written: May 16, 2018>
<Written: May 16, 2018>
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